I wrote this post on Monday, then my browser crashed and I was so disgusted that I hadn't even opened TypePad since. Today I thought I would try again, and lo and behold, my entry had been mostly auto-saved. See? Miracles do happen!
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For the first week of summer vacation I stayed busy and did something (most of it work related, sigh) every day. Today, summer school began, and while it is only from 8-12, I still came home more exhausted than I was any day last week. That may have had more to do with getting up at 5:30 to go work out before work that summer school itself.
One thing I started doing last week, or rather, restarted doing, was going to the gym. In the last 8 days I've been 5 times. I have been focusing on getting my body reacquainted with exercise and just been doing about 35 minutes of cardio (elliptical machine) each day. In a week or two I will add in strength training or some group fitness classes, but for now I am just trying to get myself used to wrestling myself into the sports bra and heading out the door.
I've also been back on the Portein Power way of eating, and I feel fantastic. I am focusing on lean meats and veggies and have not eaten a pack of mini chocolate covered donuts in about 11 days, which might not seem long to you, but let me tell you that for a while there I was having about 4-5 packs a week. They are probably ready to call in a Missing Persons report at the 7-11 on the corner, since I'm not in there every morning getting the breakfast of champions.
The thing is, I know how to lose weight. I just have motivation issues. What I need is a competitive situation. If I know that I am trying to lose more weight than another person, well then, it's on. So, last Tuesday I started a miniature version of The Biggest Loser with 3 of my girlfriends. We all weighed in and took measurements and sad "before" pictures. Every 2 weeks we are getting together to eat a healthy dinner together and weigh in. I even made a spreadsheet in Excel that calculates the percent of total weight that has been lost and how many inches are gone. Wish me luck, because I want to win and be back to the old me. The one that looked like this:
When I look at that picture now, I think about how good I looked. I was wearing shorts! My arms... they look nice! But I remember at the time thinking how awful I still looked and how I wasn't good enough. My hope, when I get back to the weight I was in that picture, when I look like that again, that I will appreciate it and feel good about myself. That I will enjoy it.
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